We have been together for 4.5 years and we plan to get married in March 2025. Can you share how you deal with this situation?
The contents of the note are:
“If you plan to marry her, you should invite her to all occasions. The real issue is deeper: you don't feel comfortable inviting him anywhere because it shows a lack of pride in him. He also doesn't invite me to his events, maybe because of my past and our history. All the events we went to had issues. Is his behavior at his friend's wedding really his fault? Am I really happy if I always expect him to change and judge him?
It's not about his English skills but rather I like that I understand his thinking. The real issue is not parental approval; it's if I'm not sure about him, and if I'm sure, we're married and my parent's opinion doesn't matter. He seems to be more of a convenience now.
My reasons for considering marriage:
I want stability and focus on the more important things in life rather than these trivial things.
I want to plan family trips.
I want children.”
He wrote this two weeks ago. I read the note on his phone, and now he blames me for reading it without permission instead of admitting how hurtful it is. I broke up with him but I doubt if I made the right decision. Sometimes he seems narcissistic, and I'm not sure if it's normal to write such superficial evaluations of a partner after several years of dating. If you have experienced something similar, I hope I can get your unbiased perspective. Thank you
Hindi ito tungkol sa kung gaano kasakit o kung sino ang dapat humingi ng tawad. Tanong dito ay: puwede mo bang pakasalan ang isang tao na may ganitong pag-iisip?
Narito ang mga iniisip ko tungkol sa kanyang sinabi
Totoo ba ang tungkol sa mga events? Masama ang pag-uugali niya sa iyong mga events, hindi siya komportable na ikaw ay nasa kanya, at palaging may problema? Kung oo, ito ay mga masamang senyales.
Totoo ba na palagi kang hinuhusgahan at inaasahan niyang magbago ka? Kung oo, hindi mo siya dapat pakasalan.
Kung hindi niya matanggap ang isang taong hindi niya maintindihan ang pag-iisip. hindi niya talaga tinatanggap ka sa pinaka-pundamental na level.
Gusto mo bang “magmukhang convenience ngayon”? Hindi ko yata iniisip na gusto mo iyon.
Wala sa mga dahilan niya para magpakasal ay kasama ka.
Tama ang ginawa mo na makipag-break sa kanya. Magpatuloy ka na, taas noo.
“Hindi ito tungkol sa kanyang English skills kundi sa mas gusto ko ang naiintindihan ko ang pag-iisip.” Ang linyang ito pa lang ay nagpapakita na siya ay asshole. Anong nangyari? Tama ang desisyon mo na makipag-break sa kanya.